Song to the NightMother
by MadamaVolpe
Summary: Is it possible for the Fool of Hearts to feel love? And is it also possible for someone to even return the love? Such things Cicero asks himself, for he is yet to find out.
1. Welcome

Author Note: This little thing sprang to mind when I was in the middle of writing another fanfiction I have yet to publish. That fanfiction is a romantic one, and the romance is between my Wood Elf Eva and Cicero (believe it or not). I wanted to give Cicero's personal thoughts on what happened in the story, and here we are! I like to think that he's writing little letters to the Night-Mother, like a diary. Who knows what goes on in that little creep's mind?  
><span>Disclaimer: <span>Me no own, you no sue.  
><span>Warning:<span> **Spoiler Alert! Read at your own risk!**

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><p><em>Sweet Mother, sweet Mother, we have arrived! The Skyrim sanctuary isn't nearly as homely as the Chedyinhal one in Cyrodiil, but no matter. We like it all the same. It is a <em>cave_, Mother. A cave! Dark and decaying and desolate. I would be so terribly insulted to have a place blessed with your touch in a cave. A kind stranger helped us on the road, Mother. A benevolent, caring stranger. An elf! She had lovely eyes; like diamonds. But of course not as lovely as yours, Mother! No, no. Not as lovely as your unseeing, rotten eyes. Cicero hopes he won't stumble across the elf's broken, mutilated body. What a pity that would be! She had such lovely eyes. Cicero wanted to pluck them out and keep them close to his heart, perhaps on a string? Then Cicero could swing them. Back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth. Silver! Like the moon, the stars that twinkle and giggle and whisper. Such eyes, like the very stars themselves. The stars burn and glitter. They would burn poor Cicero if he were to touch them. But her eyes would not! No, they would ring like a million silver bells. They would ring and sing, those dear little . Astrid is calling. The fallen star. Doesn't she irritate you, Mother? I wish you'd speak to me. This silence is such a lonely friend. It teases me, Mother. The Silence. It cuddles up to poor Cicero at night, licking between the shoulder blades. It perches on my chest and stares at me with it's monstrous eyes. Make the Silence go away, Mother. Only your sweet, sweet voice can make it disappear. I want to hear what you have to say about that annoying shrew of a woman. Be well, Mother. She calls for me. She calls. Like a mournful bird with only one song, she calls._

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><p>My, my. Cicero, you little nutter. I hope you enjoyed the first entry, please read and review yadda yadda yadda.<br>_Lisbet. x_


	2. A new child

Author note: Aaaaaaaaand here's chapter two! Thank you for everyone who reviewed and/or added myself or this story to their favourites list. It really makes my day and influences me to write more.  
>Disclaimer: Only in my dreams.<p>

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><p><em>Mother! Such news, such news! Rejoice! Rejoice! Rejoice, for the elf with the diamond eyes is the Brotherhood's newest member! Another child for you to embrace, Mother. A friend for Cicero, who will weep in your deafening silence. She smiled upon Cicero, the Fool of Hearts, and that harlot glared as her as if she were…well, mad! Eva, her name is. Eva, meaning life! Oh, it did make Cicero giggle. The bittersweet irony! She parades with her name of false hope, slashing her marks with a grin like a cat. A purr comes from her parted lips. The blood on her whiskers tastes divine.<br>Hmm…I suppose her last name makes up for it. Dwin'mitore, 'by my blade'. 'Life by my blade'? Cicero approves. The Woof Elf asked Cicero for his last name, Mother. Cicero did not remember! Cicero the man is long gone, and in his place the Jester giggles. Cicero made one up, a last name.  
>'Jestre,' he replied. Jestre, Mother, Jestre! Get it? Aaah, Cicero laughed. Astrid snorted when the Fool said that but I didn't care. Eva smiled again and I smiled back. Fast friends, Mother. I feel like we can become fast, fast friends. Diamond eyes, diamond eyes, diamond eyes in the sky. She speaks softly to the Night-Daughter, the vampire, and the wolf. She's kind to them, despite Arnbjorn's snide suggestion that she belongs with the Thalmor. But her smile, her smile she reserves for Cicero. Perhaps she'll impress the leech-child and smile with the teeth of a predator. She will become a Night-Daughter too, and smile. Then Cicero shall say 'Fangs very much!' Aha! Cicero kills himself sometimes. <em>Kills_ himself! Mmm. Cicero is going to seek out the elf, the Dragonborn. He misses her smile. I'll be back soon, Mother. Back soon. Soon._

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><p>A.N: I feel I should point out that I do a Facebook roleplay of Cicero. Just in case you want to head over there and take a look, his name is 'Cicero DancingMad Jestre'.<br>Thank you for reading, and please stay tuned!  
><em>Lisbet.<br>x_


	3. She smiles

(AN): Gar! A bit of en eyesore, this one. But what is Cicero's diary without a few random entries?  
>Disclaimer: Nope. Nada. Nilch. Non. Nuuu.<p>

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><p><em><em>_Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me. Speak to me.  
>She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles. She smiles.<br>She kills. Blood spills, and she smiles and smiles and smiles and smiles and smiles and smiles and smiles and smiles and smiles._

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><p>This guy is insane. But I love him. XD<br>_Lisbet.  
>x<em>


	4. Divine bonds

_Behold, the Listener! The child who shared Mother's cold tomb, cheek to cheek, lashes to lashes. She has been found, at last! Woken from her deepest slumber, returned to us! Disgusted as he first was, Cicero is overjoyed! Happy! Over the moon! Loyal Cicero has served Mother well and has finally found the Listener. Though Cicero wanted to be the Listener, so very much. With his heart and soul, the Fool craved it. He tried to listen, he tried so hard, but your voice is not for poor, poor Cicero. Is it because she's Dragonborn, Mother? You two share some kind of bond? Voices that can shake the very earth? Cicero sighs. Never mind. There is a Listener, and all is dark and well again.  
>We eat together sometimes, Mother, the Listener and I. She talks and I listen. I got very good at listening, waiting. For you. No, no! I'm not mad. Not mad. Just happy!<em>  
><em>Sometimes I reveal a fact about myself. Cicero the man, not the Fool. She is regaled with tales of Cicero the mighty and ruthless assassin, feared by all! Well. Before he became your loyal servant, Mother. Your humble Keeper. Not that it is a bad thing, oho no. Cicero is your happy, happy Keeper. He gets so lonely sometimes though, does poor Cicero. The Listener comes and keeps the Fool company when she isn't sneaking and stabbing like the good little murderess she is. We laugh and talk and she smiles with her diamond eyes. Such beautiful eyes. And pointy ears! Pointy, pointy, pointy! She makes Cicero's blood sing with fire and desire. Full of heat, so sweet. Children of the Night-Mother! Bound by lust and passion? Oh, so very wrong. But so very right. I must listen. No...I must speak! Wouldn't Mother be happy for her children to get along so well? Perhaps not…but her diamond eyes…What if I bring you her eyes, Mother? The eyes of a Dragonborn, the eyes of your Listener? My Listener. My life. My sweet, sweet death. Sugary sweet<em>. _You shall see what Cicero has up his sleeve. _

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><p>Ah, he's brilliant. So, yes. You know the drill. Enough reviews and I shall put up the next chapter. ^w^<br>Hope I entertained you, even a little.

_Lisbet  
><em>


	5. The Hunger

__Author Note: Okay, this is where it gets a little weird. Gory, I mean. For someone so squeamish...I write a lot of gore. XD

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><p><em>That putrid, vile, filthy pretender Astrid! She slanders your darkly divine name, Mother! She spreads her taint with her lies. She is a blight on the Brotherhood, Mother. A blight! I want to cut out that abhorrent, disgusting tongue of hers. The one that sews doubt into the thoughtless minds of your other children. Did <em>**she**_ birth children to Sithis? Is _**she**_ our Unholy Matron? No, I think not! I want to feel her sleek, wet, silky blood slipping through my parted fingers, Mother. I want to cut her neck from ear to ear, so deep I can tickle her spine. Cicero hungers for her blood, Mother. He yearns to split her down the middle and throw her entrails in the air like glistening confetti. So beautiful, it would be. Ah, but loyal Cicero will stay his blade, Mother. He will stay as silent as you. For now._

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><p>Aaaaand our little jester is losing his grip on reality. Even moreso than usual. Oh, and anyone who plays Dragon Age will get the 'blight' and 'taint' references. :P<p>

Please read and review, my darlings. And enjoy! Enjoy, of course!

_Lisbet_


	6. Symphony

__So sorry it took so long, guys! I have been ridiculously busy, but I promise to get this back on track.

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><p><em>Oh, Mother! Mother! Cicero dabbled, did he. Yes! Yes! He forged those sinful bonds. He crafted such a sweet symphony of the Listener's soft moans. What sounds she made! Music to Cicero's ears. Her diamond eyes shone with lust as I made her my Queen. Cicero's Queen of Hearts. Are you disgusted, Mother? Does our forbidden passion repulse you? Do not forsake me, Mother! Cicero begs, he pleads, do not forsake me! You must despise our act, but how can I deny the burning in my loins? The Hunger has shifted. Has changed. Has been <em>_**transformed**__. Cicero no longer lusts so terribly for Astrid to be torn apart. At least, not so much. No, no, Cicero desires the Listener! The Listener who can provide the soothing coolness to ease Cicero's fire. The Listener with her diamond eyes! Sparkling! Glittering! Twinkling! The Listener who speaks so softly, so gently, as if Cicero is not a Fool but a man. Is this love, Mother? Does love exist for one such as I? The Fool of Hearts…is it possible for someone to be loved, when they kill so mercilessly? This feeling is a curse! Take it from me, Mother, I beg of you! Cicero's heart aches; so heavy in his chest. Take it back! Oh, Mother…how your child suffers. Never before has my heart suffered. It flutters, you know, like the wings of a bird. If it was truly a bird, I would snap its neck. Take it! Take it! No…no, Mother. You bestowed this gift on Cicero. You rewarded your loving Keeper. She and I will rule the world, Mother. This, I promise._

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><p><em><em>

To everyone who favourited or reviewed, thank you so much! I love every one of you, and your comments make me smile like a goof. Stay tuned!  
><em>Lisbet<br>x_


	7. Carpe Diem

Unfortunately, we're nearing the end of this story. **But**if specifically requested, I'll put the actual fanfiction this is based on up. Enjoy! And UtaNoOokami? I made the chapter longer for you. :3

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><p><em>Mother…I have questions. I have many questions. Questions that haunt me day and night. Questions that torment poor Cicero. Questions that conjure the image of a smiling Wood-Elf, grinning with those hideously beautiful diamond eyes. So many questions, like hushed whispers, scatter through the mind of the Fool. What's happening to me, Mother? Is this a punishment? Are you disciplining poor Cicero? His heart belongs to you, dear Mother, yes. To you. And yet…and yet it flutters. It flutters so. Sometimes I wish I could cut it out and embrace the darkness, just to cease that insufferable flickering I feel whenever the Listener casts a smile.<em>

_Poor, poor Cicero! He wishes to weep whenever she is wounded. He wishes to curse whenever the other Dragonborn, Tyrion, touches her. But most of all, Mother! Yes! Most of all, he wishes to sing instead of scream! I crave her, Mother. I hunger for her body. I lust after her soul. Cicero so badly wants to kiss her. Kiss her heart, kiss her lungs, kiss her liver. Suffocate her with kisses, so sweet, so soft, so gentle. I want her dead, and alive. I want to keep her alive, and be the one to drive my dagger into her gentle heart. What is this, Mother? What do you call this…this __**disease** that plagues me so? Is it love? It cannot be. The fallen star and her husband, the wolf, what **they**have is love. For the ones such as Cicero, the ones they call 'crazy', love is a myth. And we are both so crazy. Both so insane. Both loyal follows of Lady Madness. She is a formidable mistress, sister to Fate. Fate is no friend to Cicero. And yet Fate guided the Listener to Cicero, so perhaps…perhaps she is good?_

_I'm aching, Mother. Here. My heart. I ache. Cicero is so, so very tired. Love is…love is a draining force. I never truly understood why you let our lord Sithis tear apart your children. It was for love, wasn't it? All for love? It is scary what I would do for the Listener. It frightens poor Cicero, for he knows that he would lay his own throat to bone if it would make the dear Listener smile. Would I leave you, Mother? No. No, no. I could not. Cicero would have to kill his Queen. Mother…speak to me. Speak to me. Speak, speak, speak. I shall listen. Tell me what to do, Mother. Do I let the Listener live? Does Cicero confess his feelings? Shall he? Or will he be laughed at? The laughter is Cicero's friends, but if the Listener laughs…it will be his enemy._  
><em>I <em>[Here it looks like the writer was interrupted]  
><em>Mother! Mother! Did you hear that? That vile, disgusting, putrid pretender…she dares malign you, Mother! I will kill her! I will cut her wrists and bleed her dry! The pig! I shall be back soon, Mother. You will be so very proud of your child. So. Very. Proud.<em>

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><p>Three guesses what this little psycho is about to do next. Winner gets a hug! 'Till the next chapter, my lovelies. And remember: Review, review, review!<p>

_Lisbet  
>x<em>


	8. The last laugh

__Finally, the last chapter is here! I'm so sorry it's taken so long, but I hope you enjoy it! Thank you to everyone who favourited or reviewed; it fuels my writing. I hope you all enjoy reading this as I did writing it, and if requested I'll put up my other Cicero fanfic.  
>Thank you, guys! 3<p>

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><p><em>Deceiver! Faker! Fraud! Liar! Down, down, down to the darkness! The darkness that clots my veins, expands in my throat, severs my spine. The sweet silence, the darkness that shall blanket Cicero as he weeps and sobs and cries for all that he has lost. Hear me lament, Mother! Hear me sing my bitter song of regret and pain. Hear as I forsake them all, all for you! All for love! All for you...<em>

_Mother…oh, Mother. You should be delighted with your loyal Keeper, Mother. I did it. I finally did it. Cicero struck and slashed and carved through flesh like an unstoppable force of nature. He cut the vile pretender, yes he did, but did not kill her. The stupid lizard got in the way so Cicero sliced at him instead. I'm sorry, Mother. Cicero didn't __**mean **__to wound Veezara, but he protected the pretender Astrid and shielded her from the justice I would shower upon her. Cicero would've cut out her despicable tongue and made her pay for her abhorrent crime with blood. Aren't you proud, Mother? The Fool did it for you. I could tear out her tongue and sew it in your own mouth. Perhaps then you'd speak to your devoted child, Mother? Speak to me, as you do the Listener? Ah, the Listener…with those eyes like diamonds…Cicero is so sorry.  
>Mother… <em>[There is a dark stain on the paper here, which appears to be blood]

_I'm so hurt, Mother. Cicero is hurt. He ran away after wounding Veezara, fled to the Dawnstar Sanctuary. But…the pretender's dog, the wolf chased after poor, poor Cicero. We fought and…I cut him badly. He fell down and…and…oh, Mother. Cicero is hurting so terribly. I can feel the sweet, cold embrace of death tickle my spine. The laughter, Mother! The laughter is back! Those delightful giggles, once again back to keep Cicero company in his final act._

_The play is coming to an end, Mother. The curtain shall fall, the laughter shall cease, and there shall be no one to applaud poor Cicero as he draws his final breath. There will be no encore. Are you proud, Mother? I do so hope you are proud. Everything Cicero did, he did it for you. He did it for love. The Listener…no doubt she will be sent to kill poor Cicero. He was so naughty; he cannot hope to be forgiven by the Listener. Will she pause before she strikes? Will she smile? Will those diamond eyes fill with tears as she remembers the night we spent together? Or will she…will she drive her blade into Cicero's heart, as merciless as she always had been, simply a killer and her target? My Queen…I will not fight her. How could I? The Fool would be no better than dirt, then, and Cicero is not dirt. He is insane, playful, mischievous, demented and frantic, but he is not dirt._

_Will Tyrion be by her side, Mother? Cicero slashed at him, too, and the look on his face was simply delicious. Cicero so badly wanted to sever his head, but there was no time. No time. No time in the world, not at all, no more. The hourglass has turned, and Cicero is drowning in the sand, each grain constricting his throat and cutting off his air. Time has run out for poor Cicero. He shall die in this cold tomb, thinking of his Listener, waiting to be united with his Mother, to serve her always in the afterlife. I hear the laughter again, Mother. Such sweet laughter. I wish...I wish…Cicero only wishes that he had time to tell the Listener. Curse this fearful tongue of mine. If only…if only…if only, if only, if only! No time, no time. No time left in the world. The clock is ticking for poor Cicero. He feels his heartbeat begin to slow, the clockworks will soon grind to a halt. These eyes of mine shall close to the world forever.  
><em>

_I love you, Mother. By the grace of Sithis, the shadow of night, I love you. Your happy, happy Keeper I shall remain, even in death. Cicero will **always **__be with his Mother. I…Mother, I remember something. A quote, from a book long ago. 'I wonder whether the stars were set alight in heaven so that each of us may find our own'. Did you send the Listener to me? Has Cicero been wrong, all this time? Have her eyes been stars, not diamonds? Oh, Mother...if only I had time. If only Cicero had the time to tell the Listener how he feels. How he...loves. Cicero loves. Cicero is in love! All this time, those whispered nights spent tiptoeing around the Sanctuary...love, Mother! Love! True love! Love and love, and nothing but! Not hate. Not darkness. Not silence. The Bride and her Groom. The Fool and his Queen. She is unique in all the world, Mother. I think she has tamed me._

_And so...Cicero cannot kill her. Cannot even fight. Must refuse to...even raise his blade to her. No. I will be brave! I will be Cicero the man, once more, welcome my death with open arms. It is inevitable. I will miss her so, though, Mother. Cicero will miss that smile, those eyes, her ridiculously pointed ears. The way she used to steal my sweetrolls. Courageous Cicero! Brave Cicero! Cicero so full of valor for refusing to defend his own life for love!_

_I wrote you a poem, Mother. I call it 'Song to the Night Mother'._

_'With my dagger, I shall end her,  
>To the Void, I shall send her.<br>Smiling with those vile lips,  
>Body decorated with tears and rips.<br>Those lying eyes,  
>It will be such a surprise.<br>I shall strike her heart.  
>Take her apart.<br>For you, Mother, for you.  
>It's all for you.'<em>

_Mother! I hear footsteps. I hear them coming. Oh, the Listener at last! She is here! Time for Cicero to ready his heart for slaughter, a heart overflowing with love. Love for the Listener. Love for the laughter. Love for you, Mother._

_Cicero loves you._


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